Let me back up a bit. In about April of 2013 I was going crazy. We were in that dreaded wait for that special phone call from our agency about our daughter. What helped get me through was reading blogs from other families who had either just adopted or were also waiting. I came across one and after reading it I realized she was with the same agency and was also going crazy waiting. So I decided to email her. We emailed a few times about the tough wait and I remember a line she wrote was "we can wait in misery together".
About a month or so later, Carla was matched with her daughter. I was so excited for her. At that point we had only shared a few emails and we weren't that close yet. I never asked her what her daughters special need was....just didnt think it was my place. Fast forward to Aug. 1. We had finally got the call about Mayleigh. I was so nervous about her special needs and honestly had no idea where to turn for questions. So I put a post on our FB group of families who were adopting from our agency and asked if anyone knew anything about IA. A few hours later I get a private message from Carla telling me that is what her daughter Charlotte has and gave me all the info on who to call and where to send her file to be looked over. wow. So cool. But it just gets better.
From that day forward we began talking almost daily. When I was TERRIFIED about whether or not to keep mayleighs file, she was the one that talked me off the ledge! She was the one that gave me the hope that I could do this and we could do this together. After accepting Mayleigh's file, Carla got me hooked up on the FB group of other IA moms. She started sending me all the info she had on colostomy bags, companies of where to buy them, and videos of how to put them on. We were now bonded through colostomies!!
About a week after accepting Mayleighs file we got an update on Mayleigh with some pictures. I excitedly sent them to Carla. She couldnt believe it. She wrote me so excited saying she swore the picture was from a room at Maria's Big House of Hope! So once again she gave me the email of the lady to email and check if she was in fact living there. And Mayleigh was living there. And so was Carla's daughter Charlotte. Crazy! We found out later that they were actually in different rooms though.
Carla and I continued getting to know each other with our daily texts and emails. We didnt just talk about our worries about our upcoming trips to china or our long wait for our travel approvals...but everything. About our families, our likes and dislikes, decorating, and of course our daughters. We realized how alike we were and how much we had in common..not just our adoption journey but so much more. We just clicked....
Carla traveled first last Oct. for Charlotte. I had never been so excited for them. I waited nervously by the phone for texts from her and checked my emails and read her blog every time there was an update. She was going to visit orphange where Mayleigh was living. Unfortunately they only let her visit in Charlottes room so she never saw Mayleigh. But she was so close...which was awesome!
She came home with lots of advice and info for Jeff and I for our trip in Jan. It was awesome. She kind of paved the way for us on what to expect. And I was glad that later I could pave the way for her with our kiddos first surgery. I was able to give her some tips and advice on what to expect since we did our surgery a couple weeks before hers.
In between our trips to China and our kiddos first surgery, we spent lots of time texting and talking on the phone about the struggles and joys we were both facing. I think I have never been more excited (in a weird way) that we felt the same way about adoption. It wasn't as easy as we thought. It wasn't as easy bringing a child into our home who was 19 months old and lived in and orphanage her whole life. When she shared something with me or I did with her, we would say, "I feel the exact same way." Nothing felt better than that. No one in my life besides Jeff, completely GOT IT!! Our bond just continued to grow. We even laughed when I would post pictures on FB of Mayleigh in an outfit and she would send me one of Charlotte in the same pants and VERY similar shirt. It was crazy! :)
After Mayleighs surgery, Dr Levitt told me we needed to come back in 4-6 weeks to check how everything looked and take the circle stent out. When I looked at my calendar I knew 4 weeks was Brennan's first week of school and Jeff's first week at his new job in the city. Not great timing. When I realized the week prior to that 4th week was when Charlotte would be there for her surgery, I begged Dr. Levitt to let me come just a few days shy of 4 weeks! Luckily it was no problem! I excitedly texted Carla that we would finally meet!!
The week of Charlottes surgery, Carla and Dr. Levitt talked about our friendship and how I was coming. He was asking her how we knew each other, if we lived close by. She laughed and said, no we have never met in person but we talk almost daily. He was so fascinated and excited that we would get to meet for the first time. I guess throughout the week Dr. Levitt kept bringing us up...just still shocked by our friendship. I guess he is predicting that Mayleigh and Charlotte with be college roomies someday!! Too funny! That would be really neat!
When I think back about our friendship and how it all started, I realize this is no coincidence. I have NO IDEA why I decided to email Carla that afternoon. But God knew what he was doing as he paved our path for us for and for our daughters. We need each other. HE knew that. I thank God everyday for our friendship.
Looking forward to many more visits together with Carla and Charlotte..and hopefully the rest of our families at some point!! :)
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